Pushing the Fin(n)ish Line

New Site

2007-01-17T14:29:00.000+01:00

In case any of you still check on this site occassionally, I've openeda new site since I'm back in Iceland and not Finland. Click here to go to the new site.

More pictures

2006-01-22T21:37:00.000+01:00

Well, I haven't written in awhile since it was Christmas. And then coming back to Finland has been stressful. Problem after problem after problem, after stress and more stress. And the fact that all the money which I managed to save up in the last five months to use for a trip to Amsterdam with Daniel, or to visit Vinnjar and Alex in Oslo, or go to Russia has magically ended up in the bank account of the University of Iceland. All of it. I mean, all of it plus 10euros more than what I had!!!! Yup, life is good.
But I managed to get a lot of photos developed, and Annika was nice enough to drop my camera off at my apartment while I was away so I have photos from my trip to Karelia (Karjala) when I went to visit her at the beginning of December.
Click here for the photos and scroll down to all folders that have the "new" symbol next to them. Comments to the photos will follow shortly. I'm too lazy to do it right now.
Until then . . .

To know the darkness is to love the light,
to welcome dawn and fear the coming and night.
-- The Book of Counted Sorrows

Why oh Why does she wear those things!

2005-12-16T10:07:00.000+01:00

It became incredibly clear to me last night that women are evil. Pure evil! They're mean, heartless, complex, and they know what makes us tick!
One of my coworkers who is very very very attractive with a terrific body decided last night to wear a nice dress with a skirt and fishnet stockings. The stockings weren't so bad except that they stopped above mid-thigh meaning part of her gorgeous leg was exposed with the stockings and a little strap which was connected farther up. The site of this will drive almost any man wild. It certainly did me. But why does she have to wear those things? It was nothing but torture (to an extent). I was already quite drunk when I took notice and couldn't watch the comedy group but had to look at her from the other table without anyone noticing that I wasn't watching the comedy group behind me. And I say it's torture because there was nothing I could do about it. She's not married, but at least 12 years older than I am and hardly ever engaged in conversation with her at work. I doubt she would have gone for me. So I didn't have the possibility to take her to a room, slap her ass and go to town (or "Git 'r Done" for you Zach). Nope, not for me. I got to sit there, in torture, hoping dinner would last as long as possible so I wouldn't have to stand up and draw unwanted attention to myself.
Until then. . .

"Do you know that look women give you when they want to have sex? Me neither."
-Drew Carrey

2 - 1 = 4.6e

2005-12-08T13:05:00.000+01:00

2 - 1 = 4.6e

This here seems to be a pretty strange equation. Indeed it is. First, you'll realize that 2 - 1 should not equal 4.6e. Some people aren't even aware that letters can exist in math. So how can this be? On a second glance, this might be the type of equation you would find in Quantum Physics (The science of possibilities). So maybe at some sort of sub-atomic level, this equation might be possibile depending on what you're dealing with. (I'll buy anyone a beer who can tell me in what situation 50+50=99. And this is true in one instance.) But this isn't Quantum Physics either. Let me fill you in on the story of how I came across this mind-boggling equation. Hopefully, someone can figure this out. I'm not sure Will Hunting could get this one

Well, I went yesterday to the Helsingin Urheilutalo which is a gym and sports center with a swimming pool as well. I have paid for a monthly membership to this place which allows me access to the gym and the pool. But on this dark and overcast day I didn't have time to go to the gym and pool like I usually do. So I decided just to go swimming. I go to the front desk with my membership card to have the woman put on a swimming credit (one must do this every time.) The woman takes the card, puts it on the scanning machine and then tells me that I must pay 4.60€ ($5.68) to use the pool. I ask why and she tells me that when I come and use the gym I can use the pool. But if I only want to use the pool and not the gym and pool, I must pay the normal entrance fee.
Does this make sense to you? It didn't make sense to me. I gave the woman this look of disbelief and very seriously asked her to explain that again to me because that made no sense to me whatsoever. She rephrases it to say, "Your membership is valid for the Gym. When you use the Gym you THEN are allowed to go to the pool free of charge." I honestly couldn't believe what I was hearing. What fucking difference does it make if I use the Gym or not?
I then thought of a way out of it. I told the woman, "Okay, well, last week I came and used the gym, but didn't go swimming. So I'll just use the free entrance to the pool today." She looked at me with annoyance and said, "Sorry, but free use of the pool is only on the day of using the gym."
Since I didn't have any of my workout clothes nor time to work out, I couldn't just go up and work out. I then thought of another idea. I told the woman I would go to the gym. I went up the stairs to the entrance to the gym, swiped my card through, went into the lockers and to the toilet, drained the lizard, and walked back out. I went to the front desk again and told the woman as if I had never spoken to her before, "Ah, one for swimming please." She looked at me and said, "Sir, this is not funny. If you want to swim, it will cost you 4,60€." Trying to get my right of not having to pay for swimming was like trying to squeeze blood from a rock. So I forked over the cash and went on my merry, little way.

Summed up in brief: After paying 50€ for a montly membership; you use the gym, you use the pool. You don't use the gym, you pay 4,60€ each time on top of the already paid 50€ and you get to use the pool.
Can anyone figure out this equation? I remember in my advanced math courses we had to learn to show proof that a certain equation was the answer. Can anyone find the proof for this one? Or a logical explanation?
Until then. . .

"Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house."
-Robert Heinlein

"As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality."
-Albert Einstein

"In mathematics you don't understand things. You just get used to them."
-John Von Neumann

I Never Reckoned, Today Could Bare a Light

2005-12-07T23:57:00.000+01:00

Today is a fine day. A mighty fine day, indeed. What??? . . . Chicken strips for everyone???!!!

Today something was made official and it needs to made public record. It was decided upon by both parties that I, you know who I am, officially have more money in my bank account that that of Brandon, aka The White Wizard. Why is this good news? Glad you asked! You see, for the past years I've had to scrape by month by month (with the occasional help from M.O.M.) while Brandon continued to sell his soul to the money-grubbing monsters of Target, Blockbuster Video, Applebees, and O'Charleys. He was able to buy a ticket to Iceland (also to Germany two years earlier) get smashed almost every day (and take advantage of a few lovely ladies while he was at it) take a trip to the north with me in a rented car, and pay for my sorry ass half the time. This trip barely put a dent into his lovely bank account sum. Well, the tides have turned and it is now I that reign supreme. So how is it that we really measure such a feat? Well, simply put . . . I can buy more beer than he can!
Ooooohhh, the sailor's life is the life for me with a bump deedly dump and a diddly dee. And I never ever gave a *bonk* about the weather, because the weather never ever gave a *bonk* about me!
Let us rejoice! "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." -The White Wizard after becoming a little Wop-Sop-Soy

The gift that keeps on giving (all year round)

2005-12-01T19:03:00.000+01:00

Today I decided to stop by into one of those "erotic" shops called Sex Asema (Sex Station) to pick up some . . . uh . . . supplies. That's it! Supplies! It was a nice little shop, nothing classy, yet nothing trashy. The way I like it. I mean, the way an "erotic" shop should be. Anyway, after I make my "purchase" the woman (yes, a woman working behind the counter) tells me that since it's Christmas they include a little christmas present for all the customers. And what is it? A calculator! Yes, a calculator!!! Now I can use the calculator to calculate all of my expenses from the shops . . . I mean all the beer I drink downtown instead of using the damned little calculator on my phone. You may ask, "Why such a fuss over a calculator?" Well, for starters I don't have one! I have plenty of money to buy one, but since I have one on my computer and on my phone why spend the money on an actual one? So now I have one which is bigger, with big buttons to match my stubby little fingers! It's terrific! And since it's free, it makes it that much better. Here's a little picture of her even with the words Sextavarataol Sexasema and the address. I guess they don't want me to forget where I got it!
Until then. . .

Back Again!

2005-12-01T18:43:00.000+01:00

I know it's been awhile since I've posted anything, but I've been so busy I haven't had much time. For some news, which I realized I hadn't told anyone. Because the Socrates Agency in Iceland only offered me a job for four months and not a year like I asked I applied to the University of Helsinki as a visiting student (a priviledge only offered to students of other Nordic Universities. So I lucked out) and will be continuing my Germanic and Finnish Studies next semester. My residence permit lasts until July so I believe I will stay in Finland as long as I can before returning back to the Devil's Island.
And I am finally free from my restaurant job!!! With Stefan leaving to Germany I had to work more shifts than I wanted and when he came back another cook quick, so Stefan was sent to work at the other restaurant and I covered his shifts at my restaurant. Hence, I didn't have much time. But two months ago I asked the Manager for 3 weeks Christmas vacation which she gave me the okay for. She then tells me later that 3 weeks is too long to go without me so they will have to hire someone else while I'm gone meaning I will have only a few shifts when I get back. Since she okayed my vacation I was pissed. A week later Stefan calls to meet me for a beer and tells me to start looking for a new job because they were planning on waiting until I come back and then telling me they had no work for me. It's nice to know I'm so expendable despite the fact that I always show up to work, always take any extra shift that is asked of me, and I've never called in sick. And they can throw me away so easily. So I went to them and said I'm leaving in a week which the Manager wasn't happy about. Now they're short two cooks and Christmas is coming which is really busy. Oh well, not my problem anymore. Now I can enjoy my life again!
So I shall spend the next two weeks working in the mornings at the school and in the afternoons looking for a job with evenings off!!! It sounds nice. That's about it for now.
Until then . . .

P.S. I managed to make it to Ruth's Birthday Party. Here are the pics.

Going back to the whole Men/Women debate

2005-11-18T08:08:00.000+01:00

I haven't put any other blog up because nothing has really happened. Due to Stefan taken a week vacation to Germany and then one of the chefs at the other restaurant quitting I've had to cover a lot of extra shifts. No real free time. As soon as something interesting happens I'll post it. Otherwise I have a few new photos up. You can see some of Helsinki, from my casa, and a few strange things I come across in this country.
Until then . . .

The Essentials

2005-11-06T22:35:00.000+01:00

I find sometimes that we do a lot of things in our life out of habit without stepping back and using an subjective view. Shopping for food is one of those. I have figured out what food I eat, how much to buy, and when I have time to cook certain things. In the store I know exactly where to go to buy things and usually pick them up in a certain order. (it's very strange since the rest of my life is rather chaotic and unorganized). But I came to a stark realization just last weekend.
Saturday was a national holiday meaning everything was going to be closed, including the supermarkets. Since I was completely out of food, I thought it best to go shopping so I could have something to eat and drink for the weekend. Well, the rest of the country had decided to do the same. I went to the ATM to get some cash because I don't have a debit card. Unfortunetly, there were about 10 people waiting in line. I was in a rush because I had to leave soon to go to work. I didn't have time to wait, but I had 15€ in my pocket. I could only afford the bare essentials to survive on saturday and to wait for sunday to come around to go shopping. I debated what I needed and what I could do a day without. When I went to the cashier I actually realized what is it that I was buying. I had a case of beer (for obvious reasons), orange juice to help the imminent hangover, milk to go with my cereal for the next morning, and a package of instant Spaghetti Carbonara for dinner (breakfast on a saturday usually takes place around 3 in the afternoon. Lunch doesn't exist).
It was then I began thinking, "Holy Shit. What the hell am I buying? Have I degraded to the level of some dumb beast relying on basic drinking and recovering skills?" A situation like this is nothing to worry about, but the fact that I went into the supermarket with the thought of "what do I absolutely have to have for tomorow and what don't I need" and this was the result.
I've been wondering as to where exactly I've picked up these traits? I'm not sure it was from my Dad. Although alcoholism runs in the family, my father never had an alcohol problem and hardly drinks (1 maybe 2 drinks at a time). I did begin drinking beer on regular basis in Gemany as well as learning to take shots of nasty-ass liquers like Garlic and Herb Liquer. Although Finns do a great amount of drinking and partying on weekends, I believe it was in Iceland I learned to pushed the limit more often than I should. Luckily, I learned what my limit is, and how much I can push it without breaking the damned thing in two like the average Icelander (women included!!!)
I'm not sure there is a real point to this message, except that I would share a realization. Well, enough for now. I must get back to work.
Until then. . .

P.S. There are a few new party photos up here from Kristen's (Canada) going away party with her work colleagues. I hadn't eaten since about 9am that morning so the 4 beers I had hit me much harder than they should have. I actually don't even remember half of the photos ever being taken. And Stefan finally came back so I have my camera and am waiting for good weather and the batteries to recharge.

Battle of the Curtains!!!

2005-10-29T17:47:00.000+02:00

The battle of the sexes is a fight that still rages on. I will never understand women and they will never understand us men. Most men's minds work on logic and fact, whereas women's minds are based on feelings. (My personal observation and experience). We put our feelings aside and look at the facts. If the facts and logic contradicts what we feel, we shove our feelings aside because "our feelings undermine the facts and then we're being irrational". Women tend to do the opposite and look at how they feel about something. And if logic contradicts their feelings then it's logic that goes out the window and a decision is based on feelings. An example being, I asked some of my lady-friends why they feel the need to wake us men up when THEY can't sleep. I thought I would get an explanation as to why they feel such action is necessary (maybe they feel lonely, need some sort of support since they're suffering, etc.) and justify it which would, in turn, give me an insight into their logic. What was the response? "Of course! If we can't sleep, neither should he!" That was it! That was my explanation. I asked why he shouldn't be able to and they just said, "Because!"
This brings me to the point that our minds just work differently. Many say that men are simple and have one-track minds while women are "complex." (Actually, we men think they're irrational and complicated. It is my female friends that use the word "complex". I believe because they base most things on feeling which means there is no pattern to the chaos and they themselves don't even know why things should be a certain way. It just FEELS like it should. hence "complex" because even they don't know why). With all the men-women bashing aside, it seems that we are all complicated, complex yet simple at the same time. i.e. surprise a woman with a rose and make her day. Women: surprise a man with a beer and wear either sexy lingerie or nothing and you make OUR day! To the point, I believe that we men (although not simple) tend to try and make things as simple as possible. Why? It just makes sense. Complicated or Simple? Easy or hard? Why make life harder than it should be?
The reason why I bring this up? I ended up in women's domain not long ago and found myself lost and confused. For the huge window in my apartment, I needed some curtains. I kindly asked Irma, the woman whose desk my desk is next to what the Finnish word for curtains is. "Verhot" she replies. So that afternoon I go to a store called Kodin Ykkönen. (finnish version of Ikea). What does my man logic think? There will be a shelf with lots of packages all saying Verhot. I just need to pick out the color and the size and I'm on my way. But no!!!!
I find the section and there is no such thing as Verhot. Verhot is simply a suffix! "Sivuverhot" "Pitkäverhot" and, literally, 7 or 8 more types of Verhot!. I have no idea what the hell is what. There were some examples curtains, and none of them were what I was looking for. A lot of them were too thin (I guess they're the inner curtains or something) while other were what I was looking for but had little flowers on them or cost too much than what I could afford to spend. I go and ask one of the employees if she could help me grab some curtains because my Finnish is terrible. She points in the direction I came and says, "They're over there." She turns around and walks off. Gotta love the customer service in this country.
Since I had already spent 30 minutes gandering at all my choices I decided to call a Finn that I knew and maybe they could explain the different types and could tell me which one I needed. The two Finns I could think of to call were Marianne and Kristian. Marianne being a woman, it would be best to call her. She doesn't answer her phone. So I call Kristian. I explain the situation and beg for help. There is a brief silence and then he asks, "Isn't there just a plain, generic Verhot?" Exactly what I was thinking!!! I explained no and he told me I was barking up the wrong tree.
I finally go back to the woman I asked originally and tried to use my big, pitiful, lost and confused, dumb foreigner look and cried, "Could you help me pleeeeeeaaasse? I don't know what the hell I'm doing or what I'm looking at." That persuaded her (my seriously pissed off you don't want to fuck with bad-ass look never works, but the nice one does. and she wasn't drunk [see Finnish Fights and gay drunken Love]). She went through and explained everything to me. What the names mean, what they're for, and when she left i had a much better idea with what I was looking it. It still took another 20 minutes of looking, but I finally decided upon a package and took the risk. I left the store feeling utterly and mentaly exhausted. No exaggeration!!! I felt as though the mental capacity and my IQ had been tested to its limit! When I got home, I didn't even open the package to look at them and hang them up. I threw them to the side, grabbed myself a beer and plopped my ass on the couch and veged for an hour. The simple task of picking up some curtains (a square pieth of cloth) to hang over my window turned into a terrible and harrowing ordeal. Thoughts and comments are appreciated.
Until then. . .

p.s. the curtains turned out be exactly what I needed!

Photos

2005-10-25T20:26:00.000+02:00

I have finally got a site up to post some photos. Click here to take a look. As soon as I get my camera back from Stefan I will be sure to take more photos and show some things from Helsinki.
Until then. . .

Hevi Karaoke

2005-10-19T16:15:00.000+02:00

Not long ago, I was thinking about my partying habits. As a college student there is a tendancy to drink. As a cook, alcoholism comes with the job! Usually Gin, don't know why. And I was trying to think of the last time I really went out, partied and had a good time. One where you look back and think, shit we drank a lot and had a great time. I had a many of those with Zack (the self-proclaimed "Edgumacated Country Boy) like the time we ended up at Celtic Cross and convinced some poor, drunk Icelander that I was hungarian, he was Romanian, we were 4th cousins, and me talking to some some woman when Zach leans over and tries to whisper (but comes out as a loud shout that everyone at the table behind us and the girl I was talkin to could hear), "Shit, Thom. This girl's gonna fuck you tonight!" Ahh the days. But I haven't had a night like that since, well. . . the night I was fired from my Au Pair job. (sound funny? Kristian sure as hell thought so). so I decided to change that!
Last Friday I was off from the restaurant and Stefan had officially arrived in Finland the year before. We went with an Icelandic girl I first me on the airplane to Iceland 2.5 years ago, two spanish girls (Ruth and Ines) and were later joined by Maitona ( from France). We decided to go to Corner Bar because they were having karaoke but with metal music, dubbed Hevi Karaoke. Stefan said I had to do it. I said no and that I needed strong drink to do such a thing. (There's a reason why I play bass- i can't sing!) but Stefan brought on more beers and we knocked back a shot of koskenkorva with Maitona. Being Stefan's one year in Finland and for everything he and his girlfriend have done to help me out, I decided to do the karaoke. I signed up but Stefan got the idea that I signed him up! He was getting worried, pissed off and nervous. Threatening to get me fired from my job. I just sat there with a grin on my face.
He finall says, "Just tell me the song you signed me up for so i can be somewhat prepared." I replied, "okay, but you have to give me a cigarette first." He hands one over, I light it and respond, "The DJ will tell you when you get on stage." Stefan wasn't too happy with me. and as Zach has pointed out on many occassions when i've had strong drink, "Thom, you're such an ass!"
But the time came and my name was called. I jumped up on stage and changed the pace from all the power metal that had been sung to me belting out "Du Hast!" from Rammstein. Stefan was so surprised. He even jumped up on stage with me to headbang along with some other drunken ya-hoo.
All in all, a good night! So here are some pics that Ruth took. They're a little blurry but still good. Enjoy!

Karaoke Photos

2005-10-19T14:48:00.000+02:00

Finnish Fights and (gay) Drunken Love

2005-10-14T13:34:00.000+02:00

About two weeks ago I had a really strange and long day. It began with me having to get up at 7am on a Saturday morning (after partying until a very early 2am the night before) to go to the Helsinki Business College to teach a saturday course. Well, the courses didn't go too well, I thought. The people in the conversation courses were so shy they didn't want to talk. It was a long day and I was mentally exhausted from trying to come up with questions and to get these people to talk. After I finished at 4pm I got on the tram and went straight to my restaurant job and worked until midnight.
I got off work and was in dire need of a beer. I knew that my friends Kathi and Viktoria would be at a bar called Loose. So I went there and what do you know? They were there drinking a beer. So I grabbed myself an ice-cold brewsky (Carlsberg, actually) and sat down to enjoy this beautiful and lovely golden Throat Medicine. Then some drunk Ya-hoo has to spoil it. He comes over and pokes Kathi and the side and trying to say something. She brushes his hand away and turns her head away from him, but he persists. Now I know Kathi is more than willing to take care of herself in such a situation, but her grabbing his hand and saying stop wasn't working. And anyone who is causing a problem with my friends is causing a problem with me. And I didn't want any Stress after today. So I reached across Viktoria, tapped the guy on the shoulder and said "Beina Vittun" (or Fuck off! don't know how to spell it, but I can sure say it). The guy goes and sits down. 30 seconds later he's up again going over to Kathi and doing the same thing. I once again lean over, tap him on the shoulder, try to give my I look like a seriously fucking pissed off bad-ass you don't want to fuck with look and tell him once again to fuck off, sit back at his table with his friends and drink his beer. Unfortunetly, the whole bad-ass tough guy look I can give people (especially when I'm dressed in all black with my Punisher shirt) doesn't really work in the Nordic countries because the few times I've had to show the face, the other person was so incredibly fucking smashed and wasted they didn't know any better. He does this another time and is trying to poke her very in appropriately. And those who know me know I'm one of the biggest paci-fists you'll ever meet. But I do have a limit and he was pushin' it. Luckily, I wasn't drunk and knew that even if I beat the living shit out of this guy, he wasn't going to feel a thing (It would be like the Mama's Tacos beating Frank and I particpated in.) So I decided to do the sensible thing and go to the bartender. He gave the guy a warning but didn't throw him out. 15 seconds later he's doing the same shit again and I stand up and beginning screaming at him (in Finnish!) with him just trying to shake my hand (i don't know why drunks always want to shake hands). The drunk's friends at the table just stood and looked at me, but didn't really give a rat's ass. This is not what I needed after my day. I just wanted to drink a beer with my friends and enjoy the saturday night. Then Viktoria says, "we've finished our beers, lets just go somewhere else now." As pissed off as I was getting, it was kind of cool to get to the brink of a fight with me screaming in another language (although incredibly broken). I chug my remaining beer and then we head over to Erottaja. And this place is like the crowd of Kaffibarinn mixed with an atmosphere similar to Sirkus (aka two places in Reykjavik I really fucking hate).
We find a place to sit next to five other people at a table. This placed is packed. Across the table is a guy who is totally smashed. Just looking into his glazed eyes tells you he's had too much to drink. His boyfriend as well has had a lot to drink. Out of courtesy, I asked if the guy is doing allright. He says yes and tells me he's really, really drunk and has had too much already. Then he takes another sip of his beer. I begin talking to Kathi and Viktoria and they begin laughing. They tell me I, apparently, have made one hell of an impression on the guy. I look back over to see him staring at me. And he's not just looking in my direction but giving me that sort of look. I look away and say "whatever". Well, this staring goes on for about an hour. I try to say a few words, but I don't want to be a real asshole because this guy probably doesn't even know what he's doing. Kathi and Viktoria are laughing their asses off the entire time and making jokes to me saying that it was love at a first sight and should offer to buy him a drink or get him to buy me one. Then the guy's boyfriend comes back. The boyfriend was just as fucked up as he was. The guy then continues to give me these looks while he's caressing his boyfriends hand, who happens to be passed out in the chair leaning his head on the guy's shoulder. That was a strange sight to behold and Kathi and Viktoria were milking this situation for everything it had. The two guys suddenly get up from their chairs and he sends his boyfriend outside. Once out of view the guy puts his hand over to mine. Of course, I don't take it. He then leans over, puts his hand around the back of my neck, puts his forehead to mine and then uses his index and middle finger to rub the nape of my neck ever so slightly. Then gives me one last look and leaves. I don't need to mention that the girls were once again in hysterics!
That was my nice long day and night which I was glad to be rid of. Of course, the girls kept talking about the Drunken Love all the way back home. Kathi has even been able to perfect an immitation of the stare. But she can only do it when she's drunk, so if she gets drunk tonight I will try to take a picture of it and it share it with the rest of you.
allright, nothing more for now.
Until then. . .

The Nature of California Eccentricity

2005-09-30T14:23:00.000+02:00

For one of the classes I will be helping to teach, the professor asked me to find an article or study about cultural or geographical differences. I searched for hours for something to use with no luck. I did happen to come across this page which I found quite interesting. As many who read this, we all know that going to another country or another place really shows you more about yourself and where you're from. Having lived in Germany, Iceland, and now Finland, I've learned more and more about myself as an American. But not really as a Californian. Okay, some things when I went to the south, but below is a introduction to a new book called Eccentric California by a one Jan Friedman. I read this and thought it through and applied it to my life and living situation and find that, yea. . . it's quite true. So I thought I'd share the article and maybe people might have a better understanding of the guy who studies German in Iceland (as soon to be studying German in Finland). So maybe I'm not stupid or insane, but "eccentric" as the article points out.

The Nature of California Eccentricity
California is a place where much of the population is considered off-kilter by many Americans not living there. Not that this bothers them much as they revel in the uniqueness of their collective eccentricity. No indeed, they consider themselves to be in the enviable position of eccentrics the world over. They’re just following their bliss, allowing themselves the freedom to behave in ways that most of us would find odd or scary. They're quite blessed, really, since they don't care what others think, only needing to live up to their own expectations to be happy. They have absolute faith that their way is the right one and if you can’t see the light, well … it's your loss.
California likes to think of itself as the "I told you so" state, always first to think up unconventional ideas like Frisbees, Barbies, motels, skateboards, hula hoops, ant farms, drive-in churches, popsicles, Levi’s, McDonald's, fortune cookies, and the Jaccuzi, By the time the rest of the country enthusiastically embraces their cutting edge concepts, the trend is already over in California even if it just surfaced yesterday. They’re also first with more serious concerns, incubators of environmental and political issues that often seem absurd at first (and sometimes for decades) until the time is ripe and some Washington politician adopts a previously ridiculed crusade as his own.
It's no surprise that eccentricity flourishes in such an environment of individualism and creativity as California enjoys. Eccentrics are non-conformists, rejoicing in being different. They’re highly creative, motivated by curiosity, and often idealistic, just wanting to make the world a better place through their contributions. By choosing to behave unconventionally, and by not needing reinforcement from others, they enjoy a freedom that eludes most of us. Happily indulging their obsessions, they'll persist at whatever makes them happy regardless of what society may think. Opinionated and outspoken, eccentrics think that if you’d just come around to their way of thinking, you’ll be as happy as they are. They’ll bend your ear for hours if you'll let them, going on and on about the virtues of their passion, be it collecting hubcaps, protecting some disadvantage species, or building a three-story mountain in God’s honor out of hay, adobe, window putty and old paint. By filtering out what is inconsequential to them, they're free to focus, usually obsessively, on their peculiar pursuit. For them, happiness is the light at the end of a funnel.

Stupid People Shouldn't Breed!!!

2005-09-28T12:04:00.000+02:00

We have all learned in our lovely biology courses over the years that genes and traits from one person are passed on to the offspring. With my experiences, I believe stupidity is one of those traits that can carry over. For for this reason, I should consider taking up a life of celebacy.
I say this because I have done two incredibly, fucking stupid things this past month.
The first incident occurred on the day I was moving into my new apartment. I had a few more things from Apartment 1 to take to my new apartment before the owner of Apartment 1 was to move back in an hour later. The night before I had trouble opening the door. I had to turn the key really hard to finally get it to open. On this day I had the same problem, only it wouldn't open. The harder I tried the more frustrated I go. It is at this point that the normal person with "common sense" (funny, common sense never seems to be that common anymore) that the door just won't open. But no! The thought didn't occur to me. Instead, I found a way to get some good leverage on the key and turned really really hard until SNAP!!! I broke the key off in the lock. Now I was really frustrated. Cherdpan (owner of apartment 1) was due back in an hour and my stuff was still at his place and I hadn't had a chance to clean up. So I begin walking back to the apartment when I take a look at my keys and realize the key for my new apartment is quite intact, while the key to Cherdpan's apartment is, well . . ., missing a huge chunk. (most everyone in Finland uses the lock company Abloy which means that every key in this city looks exactly the same! both the apartment keys, the keys I had at the family's house, as well as the key to my office building are all identical. I call Cherdpan and explain the situation and luckily he had a spare key. But I had no way of getting into mine. So I call Stefan for help. He arrives with tools to try and pull the lodged piece of cloned key out of the lock with no luck. We begin calling locksmiths all over helsinki. It was about 2pm. Some companies were giving me some bullshit about having to get clearance to go into the building and will call back. some called back with more bullshit while others didn't. And in Finland after 4pm, everying costs double due to "afterwork" hours. One company flat out told me they wouldn't get anyone there until after 4. so I made an apointment for the next day and crashed at Stefan's. And the fact that this was my first day of quiting cigarettes (and Stefan being a chain smoker and rubbing it in my face) didnt put me in the best mood. but at 8am in the morning and 60euros /$80 later I was home.
The second bit of stupidity occured last week. My friend Daniel from Berlin said he would come to HELLsinki to visit. He was going to fly to Tallinn, Estonia and stay the night and the next day I take the ferry from Helsinki to Tallinn, we walk around the city, drink lots of really cheap beer, and then go back to Helsinki in the evening. On the Wednesday before I was told that I had not only Saturday free but Friday as well. In a split decision I decided to go to Tallinn on Friday, meet Daniel at the airport that night, stay in the same hostel, party all night with the lovely Estonian women, and go back to Helsinki the next day. So I bought the tickets and booked the hostel. After a long day on Thursday, I finally got home around 1 in the morning. I began packing my bags. The last thing I needed was my passport. I searched and couldn't find it. Only then did it dawn on me that I turned my passport over to immigration on Monday so they could issue me my extended work permit (which was supposed to take another two months). Once again I turned to Stefan for guidance to see whether I needed my passport to go to Estonia or just an ID since Estonia is now in the EU. He said "Yes, you need it!" So, of course, I cancel the trip on Friday. But I wasnt going to give up. I thought I would go down to the immigration and see if they could give me my passport back as well as a little letter saying that my extended residence permit is in the works (my last permit actually expired Aug. 31). I knew it was a long shot, but asking costs nothing. And the fact that the Ferry to Tallinn was sold out for Saturday and I had Daniel's ticket to come to Helsinki, but no way to get it to him. So I go and wait in line for the usual 2 hours. The woman said she could give me my passport back, but wasn't sure I'd be let back in Finland on my return trip. She tried calling Passport control at the harbor and other places with no luck. It looked as though I was out of luck. Suddenly, she decides to actually bring my info up on the computer. Then she looks at me and says, "Oh, you're permit has been extended and a new visa has already been placed in your passport!" She could have saved me 20 minutes of frustration and anguish by typing in my info from the start, but no she lets me suffer! But I got my passport, changed my ferry ticket for a one day ticket on saturday and the rest went on from there.
I guess, now all I need to do is either take up Yoga to relieve the future, sexual desires that I won't satisfy or make a little trip to the doctor for a little Snip, Snip! and I should be well on my way!!!
Until then. . .

Kindness of Strangers

2005-09-13T12:39:00.000+02:00

I awoke this morning feeling tired as usual and got ready for work. Today was the first somewhat cold day that I actually had to put my sweatshirt on. Then while waiting for the tram, the guy next to me points to his wrist indicating he wants to know what time it is. I look at the time and respond "Kello on yhdeksän neljäkymmentä" (9.40), feeling proud that I was able to respond with numbers for the first time in Finnish.
A minute later the guy, not dressed to the 9's but not like your usual poor drunk, took out a half liter bottle of really cheap, bad tasting Estonian Vodka. This shit's just as bad as Koskenkorva (sorry to you Fins, but i'm not a fan of this vodka named after Koske's Ear or waterfall or whatever the hell it is). He just opens the bottle and leans his head back and takes a nice big, huge, healthy swig of warm vodka. By this time it's only 9.41 in the morning. That's early, even for me!
He then looks at me and holds the bottle up for me to take. The thought of a swig of vodka this early in the morning before going to a workmeeting did have a strange sort of crazy appeal to it. But since I was already running five minutes late to the meeting, I didn't want to show up with Vodka on my breath. So I shook my head and said "Ei, kiitos". The girl standing to my left utters something I couldn't understand and he proceeds to hand the bottle to the girl who must have only been 17 o 18 and decked out with Van Dutch parell (although Van Drunk would have been more appropriate, but I won't split hairs.) She takes the bottle and and downs a couple of gulps like a fish would water!!! Then she hands it back to the man while I'm standing there wide-eyed with disbelief.
While I was pondering the events of "The Offering" in the tram did I remember Kristian telling what is so great about Finnish work-culture. "I can show up 15 minutes late to work and no one cares. I show up to work drunk. I tell them I'm too drunk to work and am going home. I will come back tomorrow and finish the work, and nobody cares."
Oh well, better safe than sorry, I guess. But I missed out on my chance for some real Gonzo Journalism.
Until then. . .

Machine of Money

2005-09-12T10:59:00.000+02:00

There is something I recently discovered. It's one of the greatest things in the world!!! I'm sure some of you may know about it as well, but I have decided to share it with the rest of you who don't. It's called the Machine of Money (a.k.a. M.O.M.) All you need is a touch-tone phone. In order to access the Machine of Money, you must follow these simple steps.
1. You must figure out the the access code which connects you to the Machine of Money. This number differs for everybody so you must search in the deepest, darkest corners of your brain, or look in your personal phone book.
2. After you have dialed the number an operator will come on the phone. You must, ever so non-chalantly, ask to speak with M.O.M (M.O.T.H.E.R. works as well).
3. This is the most important step of them all! Once the voice on the other end says, "This is M.O.M." you must then give the three worded, voice-actived password. Just say into the phone, "I love you". The operator will then ask you how much money is needed, and you need to then discuss with the operator and convince him/her why said amount is necessary and an agreement will be made. Five minutes later, the money is sitting in your acccount. Almost pure magic!!!

Now go on and try it yourselves and see if it really works! If you copy and paste this to an email and send it to 10 people in the next 10 minutes, not only will you magically have free money in your account, but you will also meet the person of your dreams tonight at midnight!

Ashley Graz of Pittsburg, PA got over $300 and met John that night while spending her new, free money at the bar!

Ryan A. Mayer of Raleigh, NC tried it when his starting day of work was delayed for a month. Unfortunetly, he didn't send the mail so it took him over a month until he met his dream girl Janika!

It really does work!!!

The Last Few Months

2005-09-11T10:31:00.000+02:00

Since I haven't written very many of you during the summer, I thought it a good idea to sum up the last few months. I came to Finland to work as an Au Pair during the summer to get to know the Finnish culture first-hand and to pick up the language. In the first week I was given the nickname Tomppa (equivilent of Tommy) by a drunk Finn named Pekka who said I needed a Finnish name if I were living in Finland. The first few weeks went pretty good, but once July hit they didn't. Basically, the problem was lack of communication. As my employers, the family failed to approach me when they were unsatisfied with how I was doing things. The harder I tried to do what they were expecting of me, the more they stepped in and had friends and relatives come and take care of the kids and cook their lunch. It finally came to a point (after we agreed to change my wages to hourly pay) when they went on vacation for eight days leaving me no work to do, and when they came back told me that the father had two more weeks vacation and wanted to spend time with the kids. So my hours were cut to 2 hours of house work a day without my agreeing to it. I approached the parents with this dilemma and them saying I could work on the grandparents farm the next week to earn more money, to which I responded that is not in my contract to do farm work to make up the wages nor did I agree on a decrease in hours. Well, the next day they came to me and said they have been unsatisfied with me the entire time and I have until the end of the weekend to pack my stuff, find a place to live, and move out. (It was thursday afternoon).
Luckily, everything worked out. A friend of mine let me stay at his place for the weekend and I found an apartment available only for the month of August. The family, seeing as they were extremely, extremely poor (I saw an ad which had their same coffee machine ON SALE!!! for about 150€/$200, yea. these people were living month to month) gave me for the entire month of July only what they, apparently, could afford which was a little more than what they paid for their coffee machine (and the coffee didn't even taste like anything special nor worth 150€) .
But everything worked out. I got some extra money from MOM, returned to the restaurant business and began working.
Just last week I moved into a new apartment about 4 buildings down from the one I stayed in for August which is located in a part of Helsinki called Kallio and more specifically Sörnäinen, and began my job working as an English Language Consultant/English teacher at an Adult Learner Center called MJK Instituuti.
I'm currently working 8 days a week between both jobs and waiting until my restaurant hours get back so I can actually have some free time (which should hopefully be next week!
That's about it for now.
Until then

Intro

2005-09-10T21:39:00.000+02:00

Well, most of you who read this know me and know that I finally relocated off of the Teufelsinsel (Iceland) and to Helsinki, Finland. Seeing as I, like Claudia, am terrible with emails I'll just use this to put up some photos and describe some random wanders. Until then