Finnish Fights and (gay) Drunken Love

About two weeks ago I had a really strange and long day. It began with me having to get up at 7am on a Saturday morning (after partying until a very early 2am the night before) to go to the Helsinki Business College to teach a saturday course. Well, the courses didn't go too well, I thought. The people in the conversation courses were so shy they didn't want to talk. It was a long day and I was mentally exhausted from trying to come up with questions and to get these people to talk. After I finished at 4pm I got on the tram and went straight to my restaurant job and worked until midnight.
I got off work and was in dire need of a beer. I knew that my friends Kathi and Viktoria would be at a bar called Loose. So I went there and what do you know? They were there drinking a beer. So I grabbed myself an ice-cold brewsky (Carlsberg, actually) and sat down to enjoy this beautiful and lovely golden Throat Medicine. Then some drunk Ya-hoo has to spoil it. He comes over and pokes Kathi and the side and trying to say something. She brushes his hand away and turns her head away from him, but he persists. Now I know Kathi is more than willing to take care of herself in such a situation, but her grabbing his hand and saying stop wasn't working. And anyone who is causing a problem with my friends is causing a problem with me. And I didn't want any Stress after today. So I reached across Viktoria, tapped the guy on the shoulder and said "Beina Vittun" (or Fuck off! don't know how to spell it, but I can sure say it). The guy goes and sits down. 30 seconds later he's up again going over to Kathi and doing the same thing. I once again lean over, tap him on the shoulder, try to give my I look like a seriously fucking pissed off bad-ass you don't want to fuck with look and tell him once again to fuck off, sit back at his table with his friends and drink his beer. Unfortunetly, the whole bad-ass tough guy look I can give people (especially when I'm dressed in all black with my Punisher shirt) doesn't really work in the Nordic countries because the few times I've had to show the face, the other person was so incredibly fucking smashed and wasted they didn't know any better. He does this another time and is trying to poke her very in appropriately. And those who know me know I'm one of the biggest paci-fists you'll ever meet. But I do have a limit and he was pushin' it. Luckily, I wasn't drunk and knew that even if I beat the living shit out of this guy, he wasn't going to feel a thing (It would be like the Mama's Tacos beating Frank and I particpated in.) So I decided to do the sensible thing and go to the bartender. He gave the guy a warning but didn't throw him out. 15 seconds later he's doing the same shit again and I stand up and beginning screaming at him (in Finnish!) with him just trying to shake my hand (i don't know why drunks always want to shake hands). The drunk's friends at the table just stood and looked at me, but didn't really give a rat's ass. This is not what I needed after my day. I just wanted to drink a beer with my friends and enjoy the saturday night. Then Viktoria says, "we've finished our beers, lets just go somewhere else now." As pissed off as I was getting, it was kind of cool to get to the brink of a fight with me screaming in another language (although incredibly broken). I chug my remaining beer and then we head over to Erottaja. And this place is like the crowd of Kaffibarinn mixed with an atmosphere similar to Sirkus (aka two places in Reykjavik I really fucking hate).
We find a place to sit next to five other people at a table. This placed is packed. Across the table is a guy who is totally smashed. Just looking into his glazed eyes tells you he's had too much to drink. His boyfriend as well has had a lot to drink. Out of courtesy, I asked if the guy is doing allright. He says yes and tells me he's really, really drunk and has had too much already. Then he takes another sip of his beer. I begin talking to Kathi and Viktoria and they begin laughing. They tell me I, apparently, have made one hell of an impression on the guy. I look back over to see him staring at me. And he's not just looking in my direction but giving me that sort of look. I look away and say "whatever". Well, this staring goes on for about an hour. I try to say a few words, but I don't want to be a real asshole because this guy probably doesn't even know what he's doing. Kathi and Viktoria are laughing their asses off the entire time and making jokes to me saying that it was love at a first sight and should offer to buy him a drink or get him to buy me one. Then the guy's boyfriend comes back. The boyfriend was just as fucked up as he was. The guy then continues to give me these looks while he's caressing his boyfriends hand, who happens to be passed out in the chair leaning his head on the guy's shoulder. That was a strange sight to behold and Kathi and Viktoria were milking this situation for everything it had. The two guys suddenly get up from their chairs and he sends his boyfriend outside. Once out of view the guy puts his hand over to mine. Of course, I don't take it. He then leans over, puts his hand around the back of my neck, puts his forehead to mine and then uses his index and middle finger to rub the nape of my neck ever so slightly. Then gives me one last look and leaves. I don't need to mention that the girls were once again in hysterics!
That was my nice long day and night which I was glad to be rid of. Of course, the girls kept talking about the Drunken Love all the way back home. Kathi has even been able to perfect an immitation of the stare. But she can only do it when she's drunk, so if she gets drunk tonight I will try to take a picture of it and it share it with the rest of you.
allright, nothing more for now.
Until then. . .